Life is short. Make fun of it.
Does running late count as exercise?
I used up all my sick days, so I called in dead.
Everybody should believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink.
I took the road less traveled. Now where the hell am I?
Ever feel like like is a test... and you forgot your #2 pencil?
American goal evolution
Sorry... I have to run
Will procrastinate for food
All the World is My Stage
My God Can Kick Your God's Butt
I Don't Believe in Atheism
I'm Not Old, I'm Vintage
I See Dull People
Autographs, $1
Handle with Care
Don't Stare
So Many Guys. So Few Men.
Wanna See My Headshot?
You're Going the Wrong Way
You Looked Better Online